this is thirty-five

Thirty five.  It sounds very solidly middle-aged.  And I have a solidly middle-aged life with my husband and two kids.  But it's more than that.  I realize that the older I get, the more I appreciate what I've been given all my life.

Starting with my parents.  They are wonderful, and I think they gave me such a solid base of love, education, and religion.  Practical yet spiritual, involved but not suffocating, and supportive instead of critical.  They gave me an idyllic childhood, and by that I don't mean I got everything.  I got just enough.  Just enough to make me feel safe.  Just enough to help me reach for goals.  Just enough to let me grow.  I'd be lying if I told you I feel grown-up, but they gave me the tools to BE a grown-up.

And then I had and have the most amazing friends.  Don't even try and tell me that yours are better!  Ha!  I have had the same group of friends since pre-K.  And although we are scattered across the country, we are still so involved in each other's lives.  We have been bridesmaids for each other, god-parents for each other's children, and a lifeline when Brian has been deployed.  I actually LIVED with one of my good friends during Brian's first deployment.  That's true friendship.  Cause I'm messy.  They encourage me in every endeavor, and we feel such pride in each other's accomplishments.  I have made other close friends thanks to college and the Army, and I feel like I have been touched by the friendship gods, because they are just as amazing, too.  Heck, even those of you who I've never actually met, but I feel like I know through the blog world are amazing people, and you have made such a positive impact on my life.  (thanks for that!)  Sorry for the over-use of the word "amazing."

And of course my life didn't actually begin until Brian.  I know, so dramatic.  But he has helped me become the person I am now by showing me just how to be the best person that you can be.  Maybe it's his service to our country, maybe it's the way he takes good care of our littles, maybe it's the way he makes me feel still after all these years.  He's as good a man as they come, and he helps to set a big precedent  for me of what makes a person a good person.  He's the best.

And my children.  They have turned these past 5 years into a whirlwind.  I have never seen years melt away so quickly in my life.  I probably have gray hairs in there somewhere (who knows?) and I have lines crinkling around the edges of my eyes and mouth.  And I feel like I earned them ALL.  My kids are challenging, loving, and so lovely.  They have taught me more about myself than anyone else.  I've learned the limits of my patience (it can be short).  And I've learned the limits of my love (it's endless).  Who knew?  Children can teach us so much, if we just pay attention.

So this is thirty-five.  It doesn't feel that different than twenty-five.  And it feels hugely different all at the same time.

past in picture: February 2009

I took this picture when Fletcher was 7 1/2 months old.  I actually took quite a few pictures, and then sent out Valentine cards to everyone.  How was I so on top of things?  Must have been the whole only one child thing I had going on at the time.  I love that I can tell right where Fletcher was in life by looking at this picture.  Sure in sitting up, drooling a lot from teething, completely bald, and just as happy as he is right now.  This one is a huge sunny bright spot in my life.  He's always been like that.
(thanks, Karen for reminding me)

on singing to your children

Confession time:  I was a big choir nerd in high school.  I love singing, I grew up singing, I have a group of friends that sing every time we're together.  I sang at weddings in the summer during college to earn a little extra dough.  It's ingrained in my life.  I sing pretty much all day long.  So now my children are growing up with a singing household.  Don't worry, we listen to professional singers a lot, too.

Second confession: I make up silly little songs every day.  When the littles were born, I made up silly songs for them.  Here is Fletcher's song, sung to the tune of Allouete:

Fletcher Joseph, I love Fletcher Joseph
Fletcher Joseph, he's my little boy.
Oh I love you so so so,
Oh my Fletcher Joe Joe Joe
Fletcher Joe
Fletcher Joe
Fletcher JOE OH!

I know, I should take this on the road.  And here is Rowan's song, sung to the tune of Peter Paul and Mary's Lemon Tree:

Rowan Catherine is so pretty,
Rowan Catherine is so sweet.
And I love Rowan Catherine,
From her hair down to her feet.
Rowan Catheriiiiiiine.

Really silly songs.  But they both could say their full names before they were 18 months old!  They both request their songs often.  We all love songs that feature our names, right?  I also started making little songs for everything we would do when they were just babies.  I read a book about telling your baby everything you are doing with them, just so that they get all that verbal communication.  "We're putting on your clothes now.  Here's your shirt, and these are your pants."  Something like that.  So I of course have a song for putting on socks.  Sung to a made up tune.

Sockies on our feet
Sockies on our feet
We'll have everyone else beat
When we have sockies on our feet.

I have songs for eating.  Songs for specific foods we eat.  Songs to wake up the littles in the morning.  Songs for mornings that they go to school.  Songs for taking a bath.  You may at this point think that this is really silly, and such a waste of time.  I agree, it IS silly.  But definitely not a waste of time.

When I sing one of our daily ritual songs, the littles eyes light up in recognition of what is coming next. They are prepared, and it helps to prevent melt downs that stem from difficulties in transitioning to the next activity.  A silly song that lets the kids know that we're about to eat lunch is an easier transition from play to lunch than just suddenly announcing, "Lunch time!"  It can be jarring for a toddler to transition so suddenly, especially when they are lost in their world of play.  Singing a silly song almost extends that world into what is coming next.  I've done it both ways, and transitions are ALWAYS easier when there is a song involved.

I've had my grumpy days when I just want to TELL them to DO what I am SAYING.  And it never works.  Makes me grumpier when they don't transition well.  And I know you're probably thinking our house is a really annoying place to be, but trust me, children crying is way more annoying.

There has been an unexpected development in all this singing.  My children are making up songs.  Fletcher has mini-operas about trains while playing with trains, and Rowan takes familiar tunes and changes the words to what is going on.  Just last night Fletcher made up a song about the dinner I made, and it even RHYMED.  People, he's writing songs at the age of 4.  Move over Mozart.  Ha!

Since I love to sing, it provides an extra joy to parenting, especially when my children join in the singing.  I'm not suggesting it will work for everyone, but it has been one successful part of motherhood for me.  Happy singing!

for you

I told you last week that I was going to make you something.  And I am!  I don't know what it will be, and I don't know when I will send it to you, but I will make you something.

Here is what I need you to do:  email me at mytrashandtreasure@gmail(dot)com (don't be confused by that address, use an actual period there; just avoiding spammers).  That's it!  Just email me, tell me that you want something and leave me your address.  And please don't be shy.  If you would like some fun mail (for a change) then sign up.  And yes, if you are not in the US, I'll still send you something too.  I'll say it again.  PLEASE don't be shy.  I WANT to do this.

Why do I want to do this?  I love to make stuff.  That is just the truth.  I love to make stuff, it makes me happy, I love keeping my hands busy, and I would love to give you a gift for just being here right now. It probably won't be anything fancy, but I still want to give it to you.  I just like you a lot!  And having people to make stuff for will keep me on my goal to make at least one something a week.  So really, you're doing me a favor!

I am NOT doing this for promotion of any kind.  You don't have to follow me to get something.  This could be your first visit here, and I will still send you something.  You don't have to share my blog on Twitter, Facebook, or any other social network.  You don't even need to leave a comment.  This here blog is something I do for me, and I am not looking to build it up to make me money, or anything like that.  This is nothing but a gift to YOU from ME.

So email me.  Even if I just sent you something last week.  Even if I've known you all my life.  Even if I don't know you exist yet.  I'll put you on my list.  And then I'll start working through my list.  I may email you back with a question or two, and then I'll be working my way down the list.  So PLEASE.  Email me.  I know you're sitting there thinking, well, she probably doesn't mean ME.  YES I DO.

Thank you, friends.

*update* Thank you all for the overwhelming response!  I have loved every minute of making "somethings" for you all.  But I've closed the offer FOR NOW.  I am planning on opening an etsy shop in the Fall.  Thank you again!

spicy adobo potato soup

It's hard to believe that it is a whopping 7 degrees outside as I type this, considering it was 72 degrees earlier this week.  What a strange winter!  Yesterday the temperature starting dropping and the snow started falling, and I declared it a soup day.  I like to make random declarations like that.  Makes being a stay at home mom feel more "official."  I settled on potato soup, but I wanted something spicy, not creamy, and so this soup was born!  In hindsight, I used waaay too many chipotle peppers in adobo sauce, but it definitely warmed me up!  And Brian loves anything spicy, so I had to remind him to leave me a bowl to photograph for the blog.  It turned out delicious despite the spiciness, the potatoes and corn help to cool the heat a bit.  And it was easy to throw together!

4-5 small waxy potatoes
2 cans diced tomatoes
1 onion, diced and sauteed in olive oil
1-2 cups corn kernels (frozen or canned if you don't have fresh in the middle of winter of course)
1/8 - 1/4 cup diced chipotle peppers in adobo sauce
1/8 cup cilantro
4 cups vegetable broth
serves 4

Saute your chopped onion in olive oil until browned.  Dice your potatoes into 1/2 inch cubes.  Chop the chipotle peppers into small pieces.  I used about a 1/4 of a cup of chipotle peppers and it was SPICY.  Adjust to your taste.  Throw it all into a large pot.

Add the tomatoes, corn, and cilantro, and pour the broth on top.  Stir and bring to a boil.  Turn heat to low, and let simmer for an hour and a half.  This could all be thrown into a crock pot on low for 6 hours, too!  Quick and easy, and really filling on a cold winter day.

I put a big dollop of Greek yogurt in mine to cool it down a bit.  And if you know me at all, you know I also added some shredded sharp cheddar.  Cheese makes everything better.  Enjoy!

make something

One of my New Year's resolutions was to make something once a week.  Create something with my own hands.  I can't tell you how happy I am when I am making something.  I always want to finish, finish, finish, but then when I am actually finished with my project, I feel sad that it's over.  Is that weird?  Probably.

And these somethings that I am creating every week?  Well, I am keeping some, and I am giving other somethings away.  I've already been mailing out packages with somethings in them to friends and family.  And I am definitely counting something as small as a batch of cookies sent with Brian to share at work.

We're just about to say good bye to January, and I have to tell you that making something to give to someone else has kept me happy through a dreary winter month.

So.  Check back soon, because I am going to make something for you (yes, YOU, reading this right now).  I will post soon on the details, because I really want to send you something special.  Because you're kind of awesome to just be here right now, and you have no idea how much it means to me.  You're pretty much the best ever.